


Till Death Do Us Start

by BD_Z



Series: Till Death Do Us Start [1]
Category: Beetlejuice - Perfect/Brown & King
Genre: Birthday, F/M, Friendship/Love, Male-Female Friendship, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-23
Updated: 2019-06-23
Packaged: 2020-05-18 11:51:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19333981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BD_Z/pseuds/BD_Z
Summary: She killed him but she married him before that. The question is if the groom was dead before marriage, is it really till death do us part? More like the start. Lonely and forgotten Lydia ponders these things till her disgusting creepy old guy shows up to wish her a happy birthday... and re-enter her life to rekindle their friendship and make good on his vows. Kinda.





	Till Death Do Us Start

**Author's Note:**

> I hate seeing so much dislike for the musical but at the same time, I understand it. The chemistry is very different from what us long time fans are used to reading and writing. This is my ramble drabble fic where I explore the dynamic of developing the friendship first while both learn to grow up and make good on their marriage vows.

On a dark lonely night in Winter River, a girl lay in her bed, wishing and waiting for the last remaining ticks of the clock to strike the hour of her doom. The dreaded day that marked the year in which a number signaled the final metamorphosis from youth to adulthood. Lydia Deetz should have looked forward to this day. When she could finally have a say in her future and maybe, get out of the house, so she didn’t have to hear her dad and stepmom bang like rabbits every night.

Groaning, the girl rolled over in her bed, attempting to ignore how the air became stagnant and dull with an overwhelming sense of loneliness. Bitter, disgusting loneliness. 

Though she knew it didn’t make much sense. She had her Dad, Delia, Adam, and Barbra to care and love her. It was surprising how good the last year had been kind to her despite the devastation of losing her mom…. Oh.

That was it. 

This was her first birthday without her mother and the last night of her official childhood.

Lydia drew her blankets up tighter around her body in an attempt to cover her head in an effort to thwart off any unwelcome thoughts. So much for her life coach teaching her the basics of that bullshit. 

After all this time, being seen and reuniting with her dad, there were some unresolved grievances mostly concerning how fast he moved on even if she kinda liked Delia.

Then there was him. He left too.

Just like her mom, the only other person to see and accept her, twisted nature and all, had left. True he was a disgusting old creep, but they had taken control of the house and her life for a short time. They had some good laughs living in the old house.

Too bad, she thought, they couldn’t even stick around long enough to see me grow up. 

Lydia groaned and rolled over again. ”Stupid dead people.”

Whether that assessment was fair or not, she didn't care. She continued to wear the dumb demon’s wedding ring just to prove to herself that at least one person-creature- could understand the weird and macabre joy she would get out of horror movies and scaring people. 

Just because they all reached an understanding, just because dad began to acknowledge her and Delia had been a loving step-mother, perhaps too loving at times, it didn't mean they understood.

Not even the ghosts in the attic got it. They were too sweet even if they were trying to expand their view of the world.

It was disappointing. Lydia knew it was selfish to think that everyone should understand and appreciate her quirks, but as the clock ticked away, she stopped caring and allowed herself to wallow in loneliness and misery. Craving the attention of the ghost and their short adventures disturbed her, but as time wore on, she found herself giving in to the temptation to call him back. 

She stopped herself many times but would saying his name work anymore? After all, she did kill him. He was more ghost than demon now.

“Daylight come and me wanna….” Lydia began to sing to herself as she rolled into a ball, with a sigh, she said two words that made her heart ache, “Come home.”

Had she not been so distraught she might have felt the tingle of electricity and warmth that radiated from the ring. Unaware that the environment around her was beginning to shift, Lydia curled the blankets around her tighter.

That was until they were violently yanked off her body.

With a screech of horror, Lydia shot up in bed, bringing her bare legs closer to her body. She sat transfixed by the wide leering grin as thirsty eyes drank in the sight of her short and tank sleepwear.

“Hey, Scarecrow! Long time no see!” 

“Oh, not you…” She pulled her legs in closer and wrapped her arms around her knees, mentally check listing the possible reasons he was standing in the spectral flesh. She came up with a big ol’ blank but rather than show her excitement that he had finally returned to the land of the living, she let her smartassery take over, “What do you want?”

She didn't expect the flying leap Beetlejuice took landing on his knees, making the springy mattress bounce till Lydia lost her balance, forcing her to unwrap from the position of defense.

“What?! Can’t a guy wish his wife a happy birthday? I thought you women liked that kind of crap. Don’t tell me times have changed that much?”

His sad puppy dog face drooping pathetically as he rolled over on his back and shook a leg. This was just too bizarre to be a reality. She must have fallen asleep, but there he was, on her bed, whimpering like a mutt.

“I’m not scratching your belly, you weirdo.” Lydia tried to stop herself from smiling but realizing that it would be futile she chose to make up for it by kicking him hard. With a cry of protest from the abuse, he rolled off the bed, landing with a thump onto the floor.

Lydia winced at the sound, hoping no one heard but as she went to check on the ghost clamored back up onto her bed. He didn't look angry at least, and for that, she was glad.

“Ok, no affectionate lovey dovey shit. I get it. Fine. I can take a hint. How ’bout I just give you this instead,” Beetlejuice pulled a small package out from behind him much to her surprise. She didn't want to know where he was keeping it, but the longer she stared at it, the more he shook it in her direction. 

“Still don't trust me, huh? It's cool… I’ve been a terrible husband. Completely my fault. Hadn’t even taken you on a honeymoon. No wine and done but I did get ya something special.”

Lydia cautiously took the gift from the ghost, suspiciously following his movements as he flopped on his belly, grinning all the while. “What’s the catch?”

“Just open the damn thing already!” He snapped, then smashed his face against the mattress. “Shit, I mean just…. Go on, Darling wife of mine. Open your present.”

“You are right; I don’t trust you.” She said as she opened up the package slowly, her eyes never leaving the demon who had the hungriest look in his eye.

Surprised by the lack of bugs, smog or blatant sexual paraphernalia, Lydia felt a genuine rush of appreciation as her eyes beheld the lovely gift. Her fingers gently grazed the wiring of the delicately crafted spider brooch. A deep set red stone gave the so-called “trinket” an elegant glow. 

There was no way he could have purchased this, no way!

Just as she was about to say something, Beetlejuice took her hand and gave to top of it a gentlemanly kiss, starting her. Shivering from her nerves response to his tickling facial hair, Lydia drew her hand back. Staring at him wide-eyed, she began to sputter.

“W-What was that for!?”

A slow cocky smirk grew across his face as he rolled over and off her bed. “Come on, Let's go give your dad a heart attack. Boy, will he be thrilled to see his dear ol' son in law.”

“Not a chance.”

Deflated, he dramatically turned to her practically begging her with his hands out, ”Lyyyyyds. I just wanna show him that I'm making good on my vows to love and cherish yea… I ain’t gonna bite ya unless you ask. Unless you want a hickey. That will make him shit his pants.”

Narrowing her eyes at the ghost, she began to slide off the side of the bed. Her arms crossed over her chest in defiance. She stood her ground until he realized she wasn’t going anywhere.

“Really? Are you still mad about the whole lying, cheating, death threatening, and marriage thing?”

He began to pout, slumped shoulders and everything. If Lydia didn’t know any better, she would have pegged him for a harmless puppy. Luckily she understood the demon/ghost better than anyone. She couldn’t trust him as far as she could throw him but… he was her friend.

In a way...

In a creepy old guy meets young teen girl kinda way.

Any average person looking at this Union would be horrified, but that’s the thing…

Lydia was not normal. Lydia was strange, unusual, and married to a dead guy.

He made no move to touch her outside of that hand kiss, and as he looked at her with that pathetic expression, it began to dawn on her that he was sincerely trying to get on her good side. 

Confidence returned to Lydia when she realized where the power in this dynamic centered. With a casual, sensual stroll across the space between them, she stood in front of Beetlejuice, taking his face in her hands and guided him till he looked at her.

“Beetlejuice,” she said gently, as her fingers grazed his fuzzy face.

“What’s up, Babes?” He watched her, suspiciously waiting for her to pull another attempt at ending his existence. Did he think she was going to kill him again? 

“Beetlejuice…” Her voice crooning and soothing.

Eyes wide, the ghost stood tall though he didn’t touch her regardless of his twitching fingers.

“Be a doll and tell me,” A sly smirk crossed Lydia as she watched BJ’s face sag. “Did you come back to see if I was old enough to jump in bed with you?”

Flabbergasted, Beetlejuice stepped away cursing and swearing while Lydia laughed full and hard. Nailed it.

“I can’t … Babes…. you gotta understand. I just can’t!”

“Can’t what?” She asked, all innocence as she coyly walked around the frustrated Spector. He reached for her and then pulled away, angry at something, but Lydia didn’t have to wonder for long because he broke and spilled it all out.

“I can’t get it up with anyone! I’m fucking neutered. Taken down by the laws of matrimony. Monogamy at is dirtiest…. Babes. Lyds…. I was a fucking demon! I mean a really good fucking demon.”

“Double meaning fully absorbed.” She acknowledged before dropping down on the foot of her bed to watch the ghost meltdown. 

He threw himself at her feet, hands on her knees. Respectfully moving to the kneecaps just as Lydia realized…

“You can’t even touch me?”

“Fuck… fucking fuck. Give me some dignity!” 

“I have a better idea, dear husband of mine.” Lydia was enjoying this as she watched him sink lower, groveling at her feet.

“Can we at least kill someone? A stranger? The pizza guy?” He asked, pitifully.

With a shake of her head, Lydia crooked her finger at him, bringing him closer with just the tiniest bit of a tingle. 

“You can tell me the whole truth and maybe-just-maybe- I will pretend that this… ability to get you to do what I want …”

“Not a chance in hell! Damn! What the shit is this shit?”

Lydia’s giggle startled the ghost into silence.

“Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Beetle-“ Lydia hugged him.

“Oh, come on!”

“Shut up, you idiot.” 

Lydia squeezed him tighter and slowly Beetlejuice returned it. Silence fell between them as the moment drew out into several minutes. Then it hit… midnight.

A power surged between them, startling them both enough to pull back and look at each other. They had no idea clue what they felt, but before either of them could comment on the odd occurrence, a scream rang out, drawing their attention to the open bedroom door.

“Barbra?” “Babs!”

The woman in the doorway, still wearing the dress she died in, looked just about ready to unleash some divine justice.

“Get… get out. Get Out and get your filthy hands off her. Lydia are you alright?”

Stepping away from Beetlejuice, she stifled a giggle at his disappointed whine. She patted his shoulder before she approached Barbra.

“I’m fine. He was giving me a present.”

“Beetle- Ugh…If you tried anything...,” Barbra wrapped her arms around a startled Lydia completely smothering the protests. 

“Barbra, is she awake? I have the cake and… Ho!!! What is he doing here?” Adam dropped the cake to the floor. “Ah, gad darn it. That was the only one.”

“A cake. Nice.” Beetlejuice stepped closer to the ‘happy little family’ as the ghosts began to back away with Lydia in tow. “Look, a family meeting is great, and all but the Mrs. and I were talking.”

“You can’t possibly…”  
“No way. Out of the question.”

“Guys!” Lydia finally cried out, pulling away from her ghostly godparents. “He isn’t gonna do anything.”

“N— I- I- don’t trust him.” Adam began, but Lydia held her hands up to silence him.

“Trust me.” As she spoke, Beetlejuice could feel the weird emotion of pride well up inside him. “Thank you for the surprise but… I have to rest before tomorrow. You know Delia is gonna get weird about having a party or something.”

“We won’t leave you, not with that demon in here.” Barbra started but just like with Adam, Lydia silenced her with the gesture of a held up finger. 

“I’m eighteen. You don’t have to treat me like a child anymore.” She turned to Beetlejuice and held up a finger to him, “Not a word.”

He held his arms up in defense miming a zip of the lips, but the moment her back was turned, he did a happy dance and stuck his tongue out at the others.

Unable to argue any further the ghosts pressed their lips together before hugging and wishing Lydia a happy birthday, Adam dropped his voice enough to whisper in her ear. “Do you remember the spell to banish a ghost?” 

Lydia nodded with a big grin. 

“Good. Call if you need ya.” Adam turned to his wife, who began protesting, but he managed to convince her to join him. 

Alone, at last, she turned to the big moldy elephant in the room, still smiling as she noted the confused and miffed expression.

“What did he say?” 

Lydia smirked, ignoring BJ’s question as she stepped into his personal ‘safe zone.’ She held her hand, with the ring up to his face.

“You didn’t ask.”

“Oh, hell no. I asked.” He took a step back, “I just didn’t do it, ethically.”

Laughing at his unease, she stepped closer. 

“You didn’t ask why I was wearing it still.” 

“Oh”

The silence began to stretch between them till Beetlejuice could no longer stand the smug little grin on her face. She looked downright dangerous.

“Fine!” He snapped, “why?”

Backing away Lydia twisted in step as she meandered around her room. “You see, there was this - incident while you were gone. I went on a date.”

Now that got his attention; she noted when his ears perked. He looked like he was about to pitch the ultimate fit.

“We kissed.”

He stood taller.

“Started… snuggling” 

He stepped closer.

“He touched..”

“Don’t you dare tell me…”

Laughing, Lydia only shrugged. “Nope. Wasn’t interested but I figured you ought to know what you left behind. Adam agreed. He said there must be some reason why after five blind dates…”

“Holy shit, they were desperate. Five?”

Lydia’s grin widened. 

“I slept with two of them.”

“Oh No, the fuck you didn't.” Beetlejuice jumped up. “You can’t. If I can’t, you can’t. Impossible!”

“I got news for you. Women don’t need a hard on to have sex.” Lydia rolled her eyes.

“But, but…. you're a kid! I don’t have morals but shit… I wasn’t gonna - we were friends. You are my first friend!”

His tirade was interrupted by a round of giggles as Lydia collapsed on the floor.

“Don’t be such a baby. I didn’t sleep with them. I lost my virginity when I was 16 before you tricked me into marrying you. I didn’t like it then either. Just killing time, ya know?”

“Whoa whoa whoa…..”

“21st century. Teenage hormones…"

“Are you still fucking with me?”

“Yes.”

Beetlejuice glared at his young wife as she glibly moved across the room after standing back up. He was not happy with her, she noticed but it served him right.

“There were no dates. You left before we could talk about the whole being married to the dead thing.” Lydia sighed and shook her head. “I didn’t take the ring off because it felt wrong. Like I was betraying something inside myself which, to be honest, is fucking weird.”

“You got that right, dollface.” He ignored the dirty look she threw at him. “I couldn’t take mine off either. I thought it was some guilt shit, but it got me thinking.”

“Well, that’s a surprise.”

“Quiet you” He continued when she raised her hands in surrender. “I pulled a bunch of shit and this whole living and dying thing again really fucked with my head. I gave ya space. You had to grow up. I had to… yeah…”

“You are being weird and sentimental.”

“No, shit?”

“So…. are you trying to tell me you are sorry?” Lydia printed after a short silence. 

“You make me sound like some pussy whipped wet rag.”

“Ugh. that’s just disgusting.”

This time it was his turn to grin at the way her nose scrunched up with distaste.

“Yeah, I’m sayin’ sorry. BFFF's forever, little wifey snookums?”

”Call me Snookums and I will kill you again.” 

Beetlejuice held his hands up in defense as he watched Lydia suck on her bottom lip. He looked massively uncomfortable as she studied him. 

”Alright.” she said after a length of time.

”Alright?” 

”We can be friends- whoa!” Lydia felt herself being tackled by a stripped boulder, his arms squeezing her till she could hardly breathe.

”Thank you thank you thank you.” Beetlejuice cried over and over again.

”Clingy much? Hey! You did not just poke me with-”

”It's not what you think.” he let her go looking down to see the bulge in his pants before snickering. ”nope, it's exactly what you think.”

”Oh my God,” Lydia covered her eyes, laughing. ”You are so not the guy I planned to marry.”

Beetlejuice slicked his hair back, ”Pfft, you know you love it.”

”No.” She shot back only to shake her head. ”Ok, I kinda do. But Friends first, you got that? I'm not ready.”

”You and me both, Babes. Hey! I know this one… Ready Set…”

”You are such an idiot.”

”Love you too, Snookums.” 

Lydia shot him a death glare, but he only smirked. This was going to be hell to explain to her parents, but there was no avoiding it. They both knew that regardless of their unique arrangement, neither wanted to be alone. 

“Just so you know, even if we are married…” 

Beetlejuice perked up, looking hopeful only to be dashed by her next words.

“You sleep on the couch.”


End file.
